Its that time of year again here at Snakeoil

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Its that time of year again here at Snakeoil Empty Its that time of year again here at Snakeoil

Post by Wallace on Fri Nov 13, 2015 3:32 am

Yessir!

A Cockswell Inn/ Firkham hall annual tradition.
The reading of Wallace's brill:


Tale o' th' Knackerid Jim Carner Pony an' th' Dodgy Tombola (a "conte cruel")

(I should explain to our non-brit friends just wot a "tombola" is.
At outdoor fetes or amusements back in 60s and earlier and today as well they would have a prize draw. The tombola is a wooden, small barrel-ish thingy on a stand. There is a hatch on the barrel and a crank makes it go round and round, thus mixing up the numbered pieces of paper inside. A draw is then made for the prize.

A Jim Carner is a fete with amusement rides.


So here we have it then, PART ONE:





Jim Carna pony wor feelin reet li' roobbish.
Yon crewel villidge bairns 'ed ridden 'im 'ard orl th' live-long daay 'n 'e wor abaht ready fert knacker's yard.

Th' onny thin 'a' kept th' puir beast goin' wor shea ANGAH a' 'is stayshun i' loife 'n our Thomas Cobbley 'n orl i' general.

Jim Carna pony decidit ta tek it orl art ont' wooden tomboleur wha' nivva done 'im neya rong.
"Ah'rm gonneur drag uz sen up ta 'a' theear tomboleur 'n blow uz load o' steam-jhizzz reet int 'is mouf!", though th' Jim Carna pony , wif eur wickit grin.

Nou our lad Tomboleur 'ed bin avin eur gran' day watchin th' steam jannock, an' as th' sun wor settin, Tomboleur felt orl a' 'un wi' loife 'n wor abaht ter settle intoa eur restful kip, when 'e caught seight o' th' Jim Carna pony comin 'is waay.

"Oh fokk!" 'e sez ala 'n 'is wooden dooahr began ta tremble.

'im wor sae pretoorbit tha' 'im fergort tha' - 'ow'im wor stake-it ter grund an' possessit neya feets persay - 'im couldnae RUN.

"Muvver phffokker!" , 'im cried oot, cwappin' splinters.
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Its that time of year again here at Snakeoil Empty Re: Its that time of year again here at Snakeoil

Post by Shithead on Wed Dec 02, 2015 9:42 am

Its that time of year again here at Snakeoil 1441374232    Its that time of year again here at Snakeoil 1441374232
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